My friend posted this quote today and it so beautifully spoke to me. It breathes nothing but truth. So many of us, who have faced a horrible trauma, forget that something like that changes us forever. We have to learn to live in a different way, we have to learn to live with a hole. A hole that never fills, a scar to remind us.
We grieve, we cry, we remember, we bathe in pain, we soak up sorrow, sadness, frustration, anger and loss. Then we breathe. I read a quote that said, "life is for the living". We are here, we have survived, we know pain but we also know what life is, what taking a deep breath is, what opening our eyes feels like.
Trauma crashes in like a tsunami ( I spoke about a tsunami in my last post but it just really paints the picture of what trauma does), it pulls, it crashes, it conquers peace with its destructive fingers pulling at all parts of us. Trauma explodes in our heart and sends shock waves throughout our entire system. It pulls us down, we choke on its waves and swim between debris. That first breath after we swim to the surface, is LIFE. Our world is never the same, we will always remember the waves but what we have ahead of us is LIFE.
Acceptance and Nurture of the Darkness
This ^ is what gets us through, what "Breathes life" into the person after trauma.
I assure you, there is light after the darkness, it just may take awhile to get there. It takes pain, it takes work, it takes fists pounding on the floor, knees buckled, rivers of tears, words and talk, but you will get there. You will walk with the hole as a reminder, you will live with the scar to remember, but you will breathe. AND if you can't, if all this seems hard to achieve, talk, ask, listen, learn. Ask for help and breathe life into that new person, love the old, love the new.