Wishing.
Hoping.
Praying for a loved one to return. To be able to embrace them and feel their warmth. Is the warmth gone if they are gone? Does the cold bite our fingers and run our blood frozen? Does their memory continue to hold space within ours? It gives me comfort to know that you are with God and free of pain and voices, but that comfort doesn't replace physical presence. Hands, feet, lips, back, laugh, smile, tears, frowns, eyes gone and broken apart in fragments of my mind.
We will speak tomorrow
for I know you didn't mean to break my heart
We will stand where the ocean kisses the sand and whisper heartaches and smiles
Upon your breath my heartbeat stays, clinging tight to the life that leaves your lips
For if your chest rises, you truly are here
I won't forget to hold your hand and it will hurt for I fear letting it go
I will hold it like when we were children and I got in trouble for squeezing too tight
I will stare into your eyes with purpose and tears will race down my cheeks running away from the fire
I will not blink for time is too precious
My eyes will be replenished by our love
I will give you my ring and we will talk of the man you will marry
and the life he has given you is pure and untouched
It will just be you and I for I selfishly want your attention
You will patch up my holes sewing each piece
carefully leaving a part of your flesh inside
A piece that will live forever inside me, you will never be gone
We will speak tomorrow
for I know you didn't mean to break my heart
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